For the average person, the biggest problem at Christmas is eating too much or getting a present you don’t like. When you’re an introvert though – especially an introvert that no one thinks of as an introvert – Christmas is full of its own unique challenges. Here are my tips on surviving Christmas as an introvert.

Be nice to yourself

The most important thing. I don’t know about you, but I’m always overthinking what I’m saying, how it comes across, and how someone else has just said the thing I’m trying to say but better. Ugh. It’s exhausting and pointless! Christmas is the perfect time to lower any stupidly high expectations you have of yourself. People are generally too wrapped up (sorry not sorry) in the million things demanding their attention to notice. Or too drunk. It’s okay not to be perfect, especially when you’re surrounded by people who can keep the momentum going.

Allocate some space

Christmas is one of those times when getting peopled-out is inevitable. Figure out a space you can retreat to in advance so you can be on your own for a bit. It doesn’t need to necessarily be a whole room to yourself – sometimes it’s easier to nip out for a walk. Having a plan, even if you don’t use it, can be helpful in itself.

Confide in someone you trust

If you can, share your feelings with someone close. People often label typical introvert traits and behaviours as that person being “moody” or “anti-social,” or if they’re feeling nice, “tired”. Having someone there to explain or stand up for you makes a big difference to their emotions – and yours. It can also be helpful to have someone to talk to about you feel, or even for just a more manageable one-on-one conversation (vs being part of a big group).

Find a source for your attention

This is a trick I use a lot for anxiety, but it also works well for introverts. Set yourself a task which requires the practical triggers in your brain rather than the emotional. Anything that takes your mind off things works. This could be cooking, setting the table, last minute wrapping, putting together toys or generally assembling presents, or even just getting lost in an app, film, or game.

Know your coping mechanisms

You know what works for you – and if you don’t, just think about what you’d rather be doing at this moment in time! – to decide how to deal with a particular situation. I find eating high protein things helps, as does reading an absorbing book. Sometimes just entering a different room makes a big difference. Even simple things like heat, light and space can increase or decrease your mental comfort dramatically.

Use technology

Tablets and phones, while they are often labelled borderline antisocial, can be a lifeline at Christmas. Even the act of looking something up can provide a few minutes’ relief…especially if you’re addicted to tech like I am. There are also things like pass and play apps, photography, and other ways to involve other people while still getting a bit of escapism or distraction in.

Volunteer yourself

Helping out, especially tasks that are solo activities, are a great way to get out of the crowd without feeling like you’re being judged or labelled. Checking cooking food, picking up things that have been forgotten, and sorting recycling all fall into these categories. Jobs that everyone hates doing score big alone points.

Have an early night

Christmas can be stressful for everyone, and there’s no shame in going to bed early. Going to bed before you get tired also means you can get some time in to just be you, do the things you want to do, and de-people before it’s time to start the madness all over again.

There’s a lot of pressure to have a perfect Christmas, but the reality is that a “perfect” Christmas means different things to different people. You’re fabulous no matter what.

Merry Christmas!